Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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