weddingsv make me drug and hornr
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
No I am not eating basil off your cock
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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