his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
