is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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