how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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