Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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