just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
