ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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