Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
