my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
