i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
