i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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