She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
