I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
id be glad to
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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