; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Is it because I queefed?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
