Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
