I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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