Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
