i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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