i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize