Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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