She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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