? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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