i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
