If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
