So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
