Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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