I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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