"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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