well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
