Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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