Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(563): View more from Iowa

you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?

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(757): View more from Virginia

i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.

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(516): View more from New York

id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though

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(914): View more from New York

you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.

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(785): View more from Kansas

After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.

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(702): View more from Nevada

I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito

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(807): View more from Ontario

I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.

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(940): View more from Texas

Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...

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