I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Randomize
