I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
