hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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