Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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