I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
BRING THE BAGELS
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
