"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
