Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
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