and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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