Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
