If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
