tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
