It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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