Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize