Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Why did my mother make you get naked?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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