Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
