She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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