Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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