All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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