Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize